As I am going into a self-imposed sabbatical for an unknown period of time, there are various thoughts currently lurking in my mind. I shall write them down one by one.
To my soulmate, love of life or whatever people choose to call you
You don’t exist in my life. I tried looking out for you; I have tried a lot, and I still do. Hope drives me to do it everyday despite meeting with failure every single time. Despairness, which follows later, is depressing and sucks my happiness out of me. There is only a little bit of happiness in my life, and I don’t want to lose it. So, I am altogether going to stop believing in fairytales like soulmates.
To friends and foes
I cannot tell difference between you too. You talk to me in a straight face, but only God knows what you talk behind my back.
I am insecure about myself. I am tired of continuous criticism of the way I live my life. Yes, I do not pay any heed to them. But laughters cut clear through my self-respect and esteem.
Be a friend to me. Give me your support. I need it and I am a coward, I can’t ask for your help. But I need it nevertheless.
I have tried loving you. Yes, ups and downs are your parts and you are not fair to everyone. However, just be a little easy on me when I am down, defeated and devoid of everything.
I am not asking you to be fair. Be the way you are. I love you. Reciprocate it. Return my affections.